Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 1 Issue 7

“Two roads diverged…”
“Two roads diverged in a yellow…”
“I took…”
“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and…”

Each step I took these words raced through my mind. I was on my own pilgrimage, navigating my way through reality into my new calling.

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and I took the one less traveled by…”

I had been on my way downtown to meet up with a couple of friends at a bar but that objective was so far in the back of mind now. I was sitting at home when suddenly the spin had begun. My father was in town and it was him that started me down this revelation, I had to complete it. I started my walk down 20th street and suddenly found myself in front of some sort of Federal building; I took out my phone and snapped pictures of the both sides of the Great American Seal posted on opposite sides of the entrance.

“They’re watching you, leave inconspicuously”

I turn and start to walk down the road, stumbling side to side. Thinking to myself that they had no idea what I was up to, when they run the surveillance cameras tomorrow they’ll just see a drunk.

“I took the one less traveled by and that has made…”

I nod and smile at the passing by Native American decent man riding a bike. He ignores my attempt to connect and speeds by. Fascinating to me that the one person who I believe has an undeniable link to nature and appreciation for acceptance can ignore me, am I suppose to be doing this? I stop and find myself directly under a tree; the branches are bare and weak from the winter. I snap a couple of pictures with my phone as evidence and move on.

“Sometimes you are the shepherd and sometimes you are the flock.”

I am now walking with no destination in mind, just walking and listening. I never stop at crossroads but instead turn west or north or east or south depending on which way the crosswalk signals are sending me. I am losing control but at ease with it.

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood…”

I’m wearing sandals and it’s the middle of winter, this is my link to the past. I am beginning my walk just as so many have prior to me. Sometimes you have to walk through the mess of mud and despair so that others can have a better way. At this point I’m walking off the side of the sidewalk while the downtown crowd passes me on their way to the bars.

“Wow, that guy can’t even stay on the sidewalk, drunk.”

I haven’t had a drink all day. Suddenly I spot a man and woman in a fight in a car to the parking lot on my right. They are inside their vehicle and I do not want to draw attention to myself so I glance from time to time in their direction. I take out my phone and act like I’m on it, describing my location to the party on the other end of the phone, it’s not even on. I continue for what seems like forever (timelessness begins to play a role). The fight stops, and I continue to walk. From behind me a bumper falls off a van that was part of a recent five car crash.

“Just when you think it’s over, it’s not”

I turn around and the man makes eye contact, jumps off the woman in the passenger seat, throws the car in reverse and speeds out of the parking lot. Did I just pass the first test? Did I stop something horrible about to be done? Is this why I was sent here?
I sit down on a building stoop and cry.

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and I took the one less traveled by and that has made all the difference.”

I’m somehow standing in front of a clocktower in downtown. It’s only myself and my thoughts, not another person is around.

“You have a choice to make. Head Northwest towards the bad, evil, corrupt, and vain. Or head Northeast towards the good, unselfishness, and light. Two roads diverged…”

I walk home, towards the Northeast.

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!


Coming Correct,
d01roK

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 1 Issue 6

How much do you like the feeling you get when you’re in the middle of a dream and you’re falling, falling, falling and just waiting to hit the ground and then all of a sudden you wake up and those chills run up and down your spine? I for one love that feeling, it’s like you are seeing your death right in front of your eyes and then instantly you are completely fine and laying in your own bed. I usually lie in bed and try to collect my thoughts after those chills and at that point I would say I feel more alive than almost any other single moment. I read somewhere (in a book) that if for some reason you don’t wake up during that fall and actually hit the ground that you die, in fact that if you die in any of your dreams you actually cease to live in life as well (now how they would be able to know that, seeing how if you die in your sleep you really can’t tell someone what you were dreaming about, I’ll leave for you to ponder). If that little factoid was true I’d say that I’d have died at least 4 times since last March.

My last dream happened a couple nights ago, I’ll foreshadow here a little bit and let you know I was shot point blank range with a shotgun by a 1930’s era cop. Since I can recall I’ve always had some vivid dreams that I can usually remember with pretty good detail. However I was never killed in my dreams until after my episode and since then I’ve been shot, stabbed, beat, and sliced to death. My last occurrence pitted me riding around with Johnny Depp when all of a sudden he pulled a gun on me. It seems that we had just been set up and that we were some kind of gangsters (could be that I just saw the trailer for “Public Enemies”) in the 1930s now racing back to our hideout/home/my childhood farmhouse (makes perfect sense doesn’t it). I somehow convinced Johnny that it wasn’t me who set him up and now we were speeding around South Chuck (the town I grew up in) trying to escape from the cops (whom numbered in around the 20’s, really weird for a town of about 2,000 people).

The next thing I can remember we were driving out in a farm and looking for a bridge to cross the creek to get over to my farmhouse. We slow down when all of a sudden a cop jams his shotgun through the back window and I turn to look when boom, shot right in the chest. Now I’m no doctor but I would imagine being shot from a foot away right in the chest would be life threatening, so in theory I shouldn’t be alive. This is when it gets really weird (like it’s not already) my dream stops for an instance, as if my life stops so essentially I’m dead, this usually lasts about a few seconds (or what only I can try to guess as seconds). Suddenly I’m on my knees being yelled at to lift my arms up by the cops but due to the buckshot in my chest I’m unable to do so. Johnny Depp and the driver of our car are yelling at me to not give up any information and saying we were just in a wreck and that’s the reason for my injuries. I ignore Johnny (mistake) and tell the cops it was him (for what, I don’t know but seemed like the right thing to do). Now I’ve got Johnny Depp wanting to kill me, scary stuff.

Anyhow, like any good gangster flick we somehow escape from the cops and are now running down the creek bed looking for a place to cross. I am now with Johnny and the driver asking him why the cops were trying to kill me and his response was “for the same reason I was”. I instantly become fearful for my life, again, and jump into the creek. Johnny follows and the next thing I know I was being drowned by Johnny Depp in the creek that runs beside my old childhood farmhouse. I wake up.

I just have to shake my head and laugh at this ridiculous dream, although on the brighter side before my mania I never got to be a 1930s gangster with Johnny Depp.

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!



Coming Correct,
d01roK

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 1 Issue 5

What a bizarrely unpredictable world we live in. This was about the only phrase I could come up with to try to describe the everyday events and circumstances I’ve experienced in the past year and half or so of my life. I was driving back from an interview process when I started to ponder where I’ve been and what’s been going on since I “thought” I knew what life was all about. Not 18 months ago I had everything figured out and I was on the fast track to success. As soon as I had graduated from college I packed up and left the small town life of Ohio for the big city of the Atlanta. I had a great opportunity with a worldwide company with nothing but room for growth. I was on the fast track through the company and making my way to the top, moving all along the way from Atlanta to Denver and on my next stop to San Jose. I was Tommy Toughnuts and thought I had the world figured out, but then I woke up in a psych ward.

And to be honest, it really did feel like that, all of a sudden everything I thought I knew and understood was completely gone. I had been spending the first couple of months in 2008 planning my new relocation to San Jose to start a new position that was essentially a promotion and everything in my life was going great. Sure I was feeling higher than before but I just simply thought that I was excited to be moving and starting a new job in a new city and right near the beach. I was in that part of your life when you figure you know what it takes to be successful and happy in life, and you’re just excited and living it.

Not less than 3 months after this point I was living at home with my parents with no job and completely lost. I was unable to take care of myself any more and really didn’t know where to turn next or what to do next. My life had literally turned a 180 on itself and I was completely confused. My episode had started sometime in the middle of January of 2008 and really didn’t end until the middle of March of that same year, during those two months I had lost everything. But the crazy thing (no pun intended) is that I’m not upset about it, sure this time last year I was devastated, but I’m happy it happened. I’ve realized you don’t really know what you have until you lose everything.

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!



Coming Correct,
d01roK

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 1 Issue 4

I am absolutely dumbfounded from time to time in my life and one of those occurrences happened today when I tried to purchase a documentary from a Best Buy near The Nasty. Now I’m not trying to point any fingers or make any assumptions on the level of intellect of our neighbors to the south but I was in Kentucky at this time. I will also state for the record that I did not attempt to visit any other nearby Best Buys to research this event due to the fact I just gave up. Now to be fair I wasn’t exactly looking for the meaning of life or anything as important as that, I simply wanted to find a documentary called “The Devil and Daniel Johnston” which is about a songwriter ,singer, artist diagnosed with BMD. I know, look at me actually taking a proactive approach to learning more about this crazy ride I’m on. In any case let me paint you a picture with my lyrical paint brush.

Ok I know the last line about lyrical painting made no sense but I thought it sounded cool. In any case let me get back to my story, so I was looking online for some BMD movies or what not and found this documentary “The Devil and Daniel Johnston” that looked really interesting. Well interesting compared to my other options which incorporated Van Gogh, Patty Duke, Margot Kidder, and Stephen Fry, now while at some point I’ll probably try to watch them all I was really into the Daniel Johnston one because he’s a musician of sorts and music usually plays a pretty big role in my mania. So I’m driving to this Best Buy and I’m jamming to Flobots (could quite possibly be my new fave) and getting a little manic. I wouldn’t say anything too crazy, just my heart racing, blood pressure up, dancing in the car, singing (or my attempt at it at least) and enjoying the ride, getting pumped for this movie. So I end up at this KY Best Buy and spend the next 10 minutes looking for a documentary section of movies, with no luck mind you. I mean I could find the final season of “Knight Rider” and “Hip Hop Abs 8” but let’s not do something crazy and even at least have a documentary section there.

I’m not trying to say that even if they had a documentary section of DVD’s they’d even make any money, but I mean I do feel that at least some people out there are interested in the world outside of flat abs and cars that talk (then again this is the country in which someone funded the movie “Idiocracy”, so what can you expect?). In any case I’ll stop going off on my tangent as it may be I’m still a little manic and going off over absolutely nothing but I feel I have a point here, probably not a good one but a point nonetheless.

Seeing how I’ve been the closest thing to “normal” that I can be over the past couple of days I thought I’d talk a little bit about my manic episode back in the mountains last year. I figured I’d start out with why I sign off each post with the name d01roK, seeing how this really isn’t my name (if it was I think I’d have bigger problems than dealing with my mania) I think it’s a good place to start. Please be warned that my memory over my episode encompasses of about 2 hours or so in a span of around 3 weeks so the details maybe a little fuzzy. I did keep my gournal but try to imagine how that turned out, you’ll understand once we start getting into what was going on during the episode (hint: all over the place). Anyways during my episode I had some experiences going on in which I was convinced that I was part of some universal battle between good and evil. Now you may be asking me; was it like being stuck in the movie “Spaceballs”, and my reply is yes, except nothing like it because that would have been amazing (Mel Brooks is a genius, don’t believe me: “Blazing Saddles” & “Young Frankenstein”). So this battle going on in my mind somehow would translate into the real world in the form that I had chosen to be on the good side during my walk (another story) and now was some sort of soldier/guardian/protector of the light or good (stay with me, I know). In any case during my initiation into this role I think (once again I say the details are a little fuzzy) I was going through some sort of universal test to prove my worth.

Now part of this test I would feel like I was always being watched, like the evil/dark/opposition/or whatever my enemy was would be keeping tabs on me trying to prove I was a fake and did not deserve to be good. Now in order to prove this wasn’t so and I wasn’t scared I started a YouTube account and my name I came up with was d01roK (almost as if it was my new identity) to add favorites to my profile that would portray what I was feeling at the time. In essence trying to prove that I was worth the role that I had been given because essentially I knew what was going on and this was my way of beating the enemy. Maybe at some point I’ll try to tackle the meaning behind the videos but let’s just say they’re pretty random, ranging from “Handlebars” video to the Lipton Ice Tea commercial with Rocky Balboa (also throw in there some Penn & Teller with the American flag burning, really weird).

After taking a look at the name that I used for my YouTube profile I do have some idea on why I used it. I was at one point nicknamed D-rok and some people randomly call me that so that kind of makes sense. Now the 01 also makes a little sense once I think about it as well. During my episode I can recall having stints of time when I would just get obsessed with mathematics and time and how they related in terms of my and everyone’s existence. I recall thinking that time is almost just an “invention” or method developed by us to keep track of what we call life, as if we’re defined by time (man that sounds really weird, but it’s what was going on in my head at the time). So in my theoretical explanation there are two genders that are in existence (male and female) therefore if there are two genders then they must somehow be related to time (how I believed we measured our existence). Therefore they would have to be numerical designations for male and female in order for the mathematical formula to work (and for time and existence to be real) hence I came up with 0 and 1. The reasoning behind the 0 and 1 is that essentially in my mind there were only two numbers ever and the rest were just a result of the two (meaning there is either nothing which is 0 or something 1, thereby any other number is just a combination of the two). So to try and stop a confusing explanation I’ll just say the 01 in the name had to be some way of me showing that I understood or believed or deserved to be winning the fight because I had figured out the equation of life and time (mind bottling isn’t it). Now why the K is capitalized and the d isn’t, I have no idea why and that’s probably a good thing.

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!


Coming Correct,
d01roK

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 1 Issue 3

So in the past week or so I’ve accomplished to lose my debit card, job, parking garage card, and my mind. Ok, ok, that maybe an exaggeration but starting out this entry with that line was just irresistible, I mean it has everything to get you hooked in. There’s the subtle normal everyday occurrences of misplacing your debit card (or leaving it in the ATM machine Saturday night around midnight because you just had to beat the crowd to the bar) as well as the misplacing of the parking garage card (which I was able to accomplish in a mere six hours, a new record for myself considering it never leaves my vehicle, until now of course, I think). Add in the dramatics of losing both my mind and job, I also probably need to explain that I really didn’t lose my job, I made the decision to resign but losing my job in the first line was a lot more climatic and who doesn’t like a cliffhanger? I should also clarify that I really didn’t lose my mind, but just had probably the closest thing to another episode since Denver, once again though this isn’t nearly as climatic as my opening statement.

Yeah I did have a couple of days last week when I was cycling so severely that I actually was a little scared. I’m not talking about taking spin classes at your local Y on Monday nights cycling (while I can appreciate the fear involved in that as well) I was actually referring to going from manic back to normal back to manic to some sort of weird low emotion back to manic to normal over a course of two days. To try and paint a picture I would go from dancing my butt off in the middle of the living room jamming to Snow’s “Informer” (yes I know, simply classic) to crying my eyes out in the bathroom to running around The Nasty paranoid that I was being watched (ya know, a typical case of the Mondays). I was told that there could be triggers throughout my life that could set me into a manic state or even worse another episode, well I guess I found one. This actually came in the form of my job; I had tried to go back to doing a similar job and role in another company from which I had been working for prior to my Denver episode. The funny thing (while it may not seem funny, I have to laugh at it or I should say I’m not sure how else to handle it) there’s no guidebook or directions on how to handle BMD. While there seems to be similarities (or at least I’ve found similarities from a little research) on what other experience during mania, no one has seemed to take the time to actually study this and would rather try to “fix” the problem by drugging you beyond comprehension (mmm, I’ll pass). So really the only way to figure out if something isn’t working is to do it, wait, and see what happens. Well needless to say trying to go back to a similar industry and a similar job just wasn’t in the cards and my mind let me know that.

The good news is that as soon as I separated myself from the familiar factors I was experiencing at work my mania came back into to check. I regained control (as much as I can have I guess) and feel really good again. It was really difficult for me to have to quit my job as I was doing so well and I really struggle saying or demonstrating that I’m not able to do something. As difficult as that is there’s no doubt I would have ended back in the hospital if I didn’t take the necessary steps to separate myself from those triggers at work. I guess I’m just learning to deal with all of this and it’s a rocky road, but at least there is a road.

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!




Coming Correct,
d01roK

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 1 Issue 2

I guess if you have made it this far (and by far I mean the second entry so don’t be too proud of yourself but thanks for being a loyal friend and follower) I at least owe you some idea on how I plan to lay out this Blog. I first had the idea to look around the Internet for other Blogs about BMD to see how they were formatted and structured but then realized that was a totally lame idea. I didn’t want to be influenced or subconsciously persuaded to follow the format of someone else’s Blog and thereby be stealing their creative mojo (and plus taking the time to try and read all those Blogs just wasn’t in the cards, ok you got me and the time thing was the real reason but I wanted to try and sound intelligent for a minute, my mistake, won’t happen again). So I’m basically winging it out here and just seeing how it goes, but in my own opinion I think I’m rocking it out already. After a long deliberation and concise thought process (otherwise known as watching Fresh Prince of Bel-Air reruns and eating pizza) I’ve decided to write about my latest manic experience and if there hasn’t been one in awhile I’ll dabble back to my gournal and let you into my first full blown manic episode that happened last year (try to contain your excitement, I know my hands are already shaking).

As I mentioned I experienced my first manic episode back in 2008 while living in the quant little metropolis mountain town known as Denver, CO. While I won’t get into the details just quite yet (that would be like me being the Perry Cox to your Janitor when he spoils the end of “Sixth Sense”) I will say that I was provided a nice retreat for about a week where I could get to relax and hang out with some real interesting people, thanks Porter Hospital. In any case it was during this time that I was first put on some medicine to try and get me back to normal (whatever normal is). So I tried to stay on this Depakene and Abilify for about 8 months but let me just tell you it was like I was one of those zombies from Michael Jackson’s Thriller video minus the sweet dance moves, needless to say it wasn’t really working for me. With some support, and by some I mean little to none, I decided to wean (funny word, go ahead say it aloud, told you its funny) myself off the meds and see how I do without them. Now if by some way someone suffering from BMD or any other mental condition comes across this Blog and decides to follow my lead please note this disclaimer, I am not a physician nor have the qualifications to advise or promote anyone to drop off their meds that were prescribed to them. I tried an “Ask a Lawyer” website to see if I needed that disclaimer but they needed my email and some form of payment so I decided to pass and write that little entry down, I should be good I think (50-50). In any case since being clean I’ve reverted back to myself that I know (which is good for me and even better for humanity) but as I said I will have some periods of mania, the first I’ll tell you about actually convinced me to start this Blog, buckle up because here we go on that roller coaster (in case you didn’t read my first entry you won’t get that roller coaster reference, so go back and read it).

One of the cooler aspects of my mania is that colors seem to really play a big role on what’s going on. For instance I was driving from The Nasty over to my gym to get my swoll on (that’s a lie I was actually working out to try and get back into shape from the 20 lbs I gained from the meds, another side effect that kind of sucks) when I started to drift into mania. I started thinking about why this particular blue color car (have no idea of make or model, but stay with me as it doesn’t matter, or at least to me it doesn’t) was stopped at the stop light in the Y crossing just in front of me. Why was that car blue (not the chemical reason, because I’m pretty sure that reasoning and explanation is way above my head, ok not pretty sure I’m positive it is because I’m not sure it’s even chemistry, it might have something to do with light) and why was it at that stop light at this exact time and why was I so focused in on it. The easy answer is that the driver was on their way home and to get over it. But I think at times there’s the problem, I just let things go without appreciating or thinking about what’s really going on (or I’ve been drinking and don’t have the mental capability at the time to do anything else but complain that I have to pay a dollar to use the bathroom in a downtown bar in The Nasty, lame). In any case for some reason my mind starts racing about how the car was there in a chaotic plan that had me driving by this place at this exact time to see this blue car and trigger me down this ridiculous rhetoric I am now writing.


So I proceed to the gym and fly through my workout with my mind just running wild with what I want to do in terms of starting this Blog and what I want to write about (bottom line wanting to share this craziness with all). Basically convincing myself that this is not only a good idea but probably the best idea I’ve had since I decided to send a dozen sunflowers to Britney Spears last year on my birthday (that is a true story and seemed like a great idea at the time, once again another story we’ll explore later). So now I’ve decided that I should start writing about my mania experiences and had the idea of how to do it but for some reason I was walking out of the gym wanting some sign to tell me to do it. Well let’s just say that answer was quickly given to me, because the entire ride home I only really saw the color blue, and I mean everywhere. It started with a girl sitting beside me in her car rockin’ aviators and having blue glass paint with my name in the back window and then a blue bus there, a blue sign here, and everyone around seeming only wearing shades of blue. Then all of a sudden I see two police officers (that’s right, believe it or not they are wearing blue) cruising around on their Segways. Ok, how many cops have you seen on Segways? Other than the ones at the mall, which are security guards and not cops, I know like none. So I start getting pumped up and excited and laughing and dancing my way back to my apartment knowing that I’d just seen my “sign” so I sit down and start writing.

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!



Coming Correct,
d01roK

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 1 Issue 1

I thought about starting this blog off with an excerpt from my gournal (let’s just get this out there, if you A.) don’t get the gournal joke/reference or B.) refuse to think it’s funny after you research it online, just stop reading right now, this will more than likely be a complete waste of your time and this blog is better than that negativity and non-committal mentality you have). Great, now that we’ve weeded out the casual readers I’ll go ahead and tell you that the above “gournal” reference is from “Wet Hot American Summer” and if you have not had the luxury of opening your mind to just limitless humor for about an hour and half I suggest you rent this movie. If you have I challenge you to watch it with the farts option right now and come back to finish reading this, and if you have done the above two, congrats because you’re officially T.A.N (tough as nails). I guess I should get down to the point before I lose any more of you to credible blogs or websites out there that actually have a point and get to it before the second paragraph. I’m Bi-Polar and this is my medicine (there, got it in before the second paragraph, take that haters).




Now lets get down to the nitty and gritty (and yes I had to google that phrase to make sure I used it correctly, guess what, it was. Ok sort of, I used knitty first and got a bunch of hits for baby cats, also known as kittens, weird). In any case I was diagnosed with manic-depressive disorder about 18 months ago or so and since then my life has been quite interesting to say the least. Usually when I talk about being bipolar or manic-depressive (you know what; from now on we’ll just call it BMD, it’s easier to type and sounds pretty sweet, plus it fits within the whole capitalized letter trend going on around the world, which obviously I’m into, NBD) people usually think I’m morbidly depressed or some kind of a crazy person. In all honesty I would say maybe I’m a little crazy but who wants to be normal. If you find a normal person that’s fun to hang out with, go ahead and give up because your life is no longer interesting. So I wanted to start this blog to one; just get some stuff out there and two; to hopefully laugh and have fun at what sometimes my life/mind ends up in.




As few of you know and even fewer care about, BMD is characterized by someone experiencing emotional highs and lows throughout their life in just about the most ridiculous occurrences and times (right here is where someone would cite a credible source for this definition, note no source). To put it simply try to imagine the best/scariest/thrilling/terrifying roller coaster you’ve ever been on and multiply that by 10. (Now for those of you who have never been on a roller coaster, you’re communist and aren’t reading this so we should be good with that metaphor) Side note: For those of you who have already probably began picking out and degrading this blog because of my poor grammar and punctuation, well deal with it. True story: my Freshman year English Prof wrote on one of my papers that I disgraced my father with my poor grammar and punctuation, so I’ve made peace with it and moved on, so should you. Anyways back to my comparison, now imagine that you are in the front car of this roller coaster and slowly moving your way up the first hill when all of a sudden right before the apex on the hill the loud speaker comes on and the operator of the coaster announces this “We are sorry to inform you that the brakes on this ride have malfunctioned and there is no way for us to control your ride on the coaster, good luck”. Yeah, this could be unbelievably awesome or undeniably bad.



Needless to say I’ve had some unbelievably awesome experiences while in my mania and some undeniably bad times as well. I’ve tried to take the medical approach of seeing psychiatrists and psychologists (yes kids that’s right, these professions are not one in the same, nugget of knowledge for you) which have had me on a few types of meds and pills that really didn’t work for me. I’ve tried groups and what not but they just didn’t quite do it for me so I’ve decided that I’ll try this, I mean what’s the worse that can happen? I start climbing buildings and running around half naked, wait, that’s already happened and we’ll get to those soon enough. So please make sure your seat belt is tight around your waist and please keep your arms and legs inside the car during the ride (unless you wanna have a lot of fun of course).



Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!









Coming Correct,
d01roK