Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 3 Issue 14


I met the Devil once when I was 26 and once again at the age of 28
And as much as I had changed in those 2 years he had stayed all the same
He liked to speak of a prophecy involving a journey that would reveal my fate
Lucifer liked to whisper to me my future in hopes of my soul he could take

Beelzebub is a tricky son of a bitch that plays with faith to get his way
His game hides as madness inside your head guiding your journey from day to day
Delusions, hallucinations, and psychosis were all part the game I had to play
Convincing me my fate was always before me but that only he knows the way

At first I foolishly tried to fight the prince of darkness but it was all to no avail
He had already planted his deceptive seed in my mind that my mission can't fail
My journey of enlightenment was only his devilish way to play with my fate
I never was in search of the light; it was all rather a psychotic mental state

The fallen angel was all along really only out to blacken my heart and corrupt my soul
The journey was to play with my beliefs, manipulate my faith, and try to steal my soul
He wanted to strip away my reality so he could expose the weakness of my soul
His evil game of psychosis in my mind was only the means to the end of my soul

I never really believed in fate, in a plan, in something bigger than me
I looked at the world through naive eyes at any perspective but truly
But Lucifer's game of fate did reveal my mission and he has changed my beliefs
Because what Satan's journey of fate really showed me; was his home and where he sleeps...


 Coming Correct,

Friday, April 13, 2012

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 4 Issue 13

It’s Friday the 13th and this is my 13th issue this year which only means there’s some bad luck in the air. I think I’m good on my end with experiencing any kind of negative consequences due to the psychotic effin’ manic episodes I’ve endured. However I’m afraid to say one such young lady isn’t quite as lucky (and no I haven’t started dating someone if that’s what you’re thinking; it is a valid assumption though). Why is it her unlucky day? Well because one week from today she’s going to get served in our nation’s capital.

I’ll be in Washington D.C. next week which also means I won’t be writing a post so the bad luck continues for everyone else sans me. I haven’t been to our nation’s capital since I was in the seventh grade and still wearing soccer t-shirts and Umbros to school (the ladies just loved my checkered multi-color Umbros). To be honest while there I really didn’t learn/pay attention/appreciate/really care at all about anything other than sneaking peaks at the girls in hope of seeing a bra strap.

I mean sure we visited 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and other than being another example of Wesley Snipes solid performances as a badass (I don’t think he can play anything else and yes I do consider him as “Noxeema Jackson” in “To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything!” as badass). Staying with the Hollywood theme I also couldn’t tell you if there’s a man in the bushes or not; red team go, red team go! (Example of Jon Stewart being a badass in a movie.) This is really sad because I honestly can’t remember what else we did (“Do, do, dooo: marijuana affects the memory”) but I did see 5 solid bra straps that for some reason I still think about today.

Anyways I was obviously way too consumed by girls my first time to D.C. so I’ve decided to venture back next week. I really can’t wait to see the new dispensaries; so marijuana is a schedule one narcotic in the eyes of the Feds but you can buy it in our nation’s capital (God Bless America). Nah I’m just joshing with you, I’m going to spend the majority of my time trying to prove the Freemasons are instituting a New World Order by revealing the conspiracies surrounding the role they play in the government. That’s a lie too, I’m just going to act like a tourist; oh and dance.

Yep I’m also planning a dance off with the second best dancer in the club (we’ll call her Silver Medalist). Silver Medalist was actually living in Denver when I had my first episode. She was one of the lucky few who had the pleasure of admitting me into the hospital (there went her Thursday night). Before all that madness and what not we use to have a friendly competition on who can dominate the dance floor. She really had no chance; see crazy people really don’t give a shit what others think so we go all out on the floor.

I think if this would have been just a year ago I not only would have been pumped about defending my dance title with Silver Medalist but also of finding out more about Denver. There for awhile I wondered what others had experienced when I was manic. Seeing how my memory of that time is piss poor at best I was counting on my friends to fill in the blanks. But to be honest now I don’t really care. I’m not going to bring it up either unless she wants to talk about it. For some reason it doesn’t seem to be that big of deal to me anymore; maybe I’m looking to the future more. I know I am in regards to next week’s D.C. dance off though, that's because like I told the Silver Medalist a couple days ago:

“What? You think I just sit around the country writing books? All I do is dance!”

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!

Coming Correct,

Friday, April 6, 2012

Life full of mania with a dash of humor and a slice of normality (those are the secret ingredients) Vol 4 Issue 12

I took a deep breath and tried to relax but other than being completely uncomfortable in my first STD test (don’t hate because I’m responsible) there was something familiar about my facilitator. To be clear I’m still not sure if he was a facilitator, nurse, doctor, specialist or what because like I said I’ve never had a STD test before this so I was basically learning on the go. At any rate this guy was about to invade my personal space to the utmost extreme and I couldn’t get over the familiarity with the soon to be violator before me.

While this uncomfortable situation I’ve been describing happened years ago when I was in college the face of that man never really left me (it wasn’t haunting me but it wasn’t real nice either). My suspicions were validated the last time Cuzin Art visited Ohio and I picked him up at his parents. While inside I was perusing the pictures because I figure if someone took the time to pick them out, frame them and put them out I can at least look at them. That’s when I saw his face and the whole uncomfortable situation came rushing back to me. I asked Cuzin Art:
“This guy looks familiar, where does he work?”

Cuzin Art replied:
“Oh that’s (Radio Edit) and he used to work at the county health department before he retired.”

To which my only response was:
“I’m pretty sure he’s seen my wiener.”

Without hesitation Cuzin Art answered:
“I’m pretty sure he’s seen a lot of people’s wieners.”

We both laughed and went on with our day leaving the subject at rest. Since I believe our relationship has developed to the point where I can share sensitive subjects like this with you I should also give you full disclosure. The story above was not the only time I had a STD scare (BTW I was clean the first time but that two week waiting period to get the results was miserable) and the second time was much worse; I was in a psych ward for it.

During my second episode I was more than a little convinced that I had started the apocalypse and everyone was going to burn from the sun being too close or something sane sounding like that. Once I was admitted to the ward (Southside!) I started to notice these tiny red like blisters in a very concerning area. Being completely manic I decided to drop trow right in front of my doc and his assistant (who would later be my personal contact in the study I participated in for ten straight weeks; that was a little weird) and ask what was going on down there. I was convinced it was a direct result of me ending mankind or my punishment for what I had done. Nope, he said I had lice.

Now for the next few days I was in the ward I didn’t really know what he meant by lice so I had to wait till I was released to look it up. Crabs; he thought I had crabs. I was like are you kidding me? Not only did I just have my second manic episode and spent a week in the psych ward I have crabs now? What the fuck?

I ended up heading to a public dermatologist at the hospital that was referred to me because my life is somehow less important than someone else who doesn’t have a pre-existing condition. While there I explained to the fresh out of medical school doctor that I was diagnosed with crabs but I’m not sure how considering my month had been filled with psychosis and my sexual activity was less than non-existent. She decided to take a look so I drop trow once again and after a long enough examination to cause me some extreme concern; my day got worse. The doc leaves to get another opinion (I’m thinking that can’t be good; and I was right). Instead two more women returned with my doc and after a lengthy examination and discussion I wasn’t diagnosed with Lice (or crabs if you want to be a dick about it) and instead needed some medicine to clear up the issue.

It was more than a relief because if I would have gotten my first STD from the psych ward without having sex I’m pretty sure it would have crushed my self confidence at that point. Instead now I just have to explain the red blemishes aren’t lice (or crabs if you want to be a dick about it) if I ever drop trow again in front of an unsuspecting doc. But after getting through this winter and now into spring without any manic episodes; hopefully I’ll never have to again.

Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!

Coming Correct,