So my blood work came back from the lab this week (you would of known about this if you followed my tweets; you really should, I’m funny sometimes) and one irregularity popped out to me. So I guess they can’t tell a lick about my BMD from these tests but they did find out about my immense fear of scary movies known as Atroxtheatrophobia (my brothers despise them too so it’s a family trait).
Atroxtheatrophobia: An intense but unrealistic fear of horror movies that strive to elicit the emotions of fear, horror, and terror to their viewers.
I’ve only gone to the theater and watched three scary movies in my life:
1.) "The Blair Witch Project" in high school with Cuzin Art (I still make him go down basement steps before me)
2.) "Saw" while I was in the Witt Bubble on a double date (well Tristan and Boomer went so I had shades on in the theater and closed my eyes the majority of the time; #truestory#fact#honesty)
3.) "A Nightmare on Elm Street" in A-Town with my girlfriend whose name was so southern she hyphenated it, was way out of my league, and she also got a kick out of annoying me like getting the entire ticket line to make fun of how nervous I was for the movie (good thing she was fine as hell or I wouldn’t have put up with that shit; who am I kidding, yeah I would).
Ever since I can remember I’ve had this fear of scary movies and shared it with my brothers as well. I think Monkey put it best when he described why he hated horror movies:
“Let’s see how you do when you’re an 7 or 8 year old kid and you’re home alone out in the middle of the country back in a remote cornfield and you’re older brothers are they only ones around; and they’re scared as hell too. I guarantee you won’t be watching any of that scary movie shit then.”
The last thing my brothers and I were about to do on a dark, cold, eerie calm, and weary night in the country was watch "Children of the Corn" (oh and Cry Baby Bridge; not real fond of you either). Instead my brothers and I could probably be found watching Comedy Central and trying to laugh out of our minds the fear.
So of course when it comes to handing out symptoms with BMD my name comes up and I get dealt one of my ultimate fears of horror films; craziness. What can be more terrifying than the complete unknown, nothing scares me like pure evil. Pure evil has no reason, no cause, no justification for its ways; how can something without sympathy do anything else? That is what I see in my mania. It comes as it pleases and does as it pleases. The craziness that overcomes my world can be described simply as my own person horror film come to life. Yet I’ve found pride in living with this. Pride in knowing I am strong enough to overcome my worst fears and then some. And proud to know that I live in what other’s can only experience in nightmares; boy, that sounds crazy (which kind of makes sense).
Since many of my manic experiences involve music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and your inconvenience. Enjoy!