There’s those few
and far between moments in my life when I hear something and I’m totally caught
off guard. At these occurrences of rarity in my life I can more than likely be thinking:
“Holy Shit! I really
wasn’t expecting that.”
One of the first of
these times of astonishment and awe happened when I was in high school. I was
visiting my G’Pa and G’Ma when G’Pa stole the show and took over the story for
my G’Ma who was “telling it all wrong!” I’m not sure why but we were talking
about when I was born. Being the oldest grandson of a multi-generational
farming family I was expecting to hear a story about maybe how proud and happy they
were when I was born. But then again I am talking about my G’Pa so I should
have known better.
Instead I
received the story on how perplexed everyone in the community was because I was
such an ugly baby (I wish I was making this up). He went on to say he couldn’t
believe how such a good looking couple like my mom and dad could have such an
ugly baby. To make things better for me he mentioned another baby in the
community who was recently born and who was ugly as well with great looking
parents (it really didn’t make me feel any better at the time).
What got me
thinking about this was the conversation I had with my new doc in Xenia (wait a
minute; Xenia=Twister=Wizard of Oz=my mania; weird) I had a couple weeks back.
I must say that I really like this new guy (btw that reminds me a huge thank
you to my Aunt (sort of) for getting me into to see him, your wish is now my
command) and its not only because he said he thought I was the most insightful
person with bipolar disorder he’s ever met (who am I kidding, that’s a big part
of the reason). Actually we get along for a couple of reasons and one important
one is that he made me think: “Holy Shit! I really wasn’t expecting that.”
I’ve made it
pretty evident that I do not get along well with docs (but damn it they can be
a pain in the ass at times). My main trust issue falls into the belief they are
not serving my needs as the patient as their number one priority. As if they
have their own agendas that they’re worried a hell of a lot more than they
worry about my needs; these usually involve a new “wonder drug” they’ve had so
much success with in the past treating (or should I say masking) bipolar
disorder. I was fully prepared for another marketing pitch to me in the doc’s
office that felt a whole lot like the sales presentations I used to make to
potential clients at AT&Tizzle.
But rather my new
doc dived into his belief that there were only two drugs (depakote and lithium)
that should be used to treat bipolar disorder mania, end all be all, and the
end. “Holy Shit! I wasn’t expecting that.” It was utterly refreshing to finally
meet another doc (El Doc the other) that took the no nonsense, cut through the
bullshit approach to not only treating but understanding this BMD. Not once did
I hear him even mention another drug which is a warm welcome from the usual bombardment
of medical propaganda I’m used to receiving in docs offices.
It feels pretty
damn good to think I’ve got someone on my side that gets it, it’s even helping
me deal with the self-image issues I have somehow acquired about my looks (you
can grow out of ugliness, right?).
Since many of my manic experiences involve
music I’ve decided to add random music videos to the blog for my enjoyment and
your inconvenience. Enjoy!
Coming Correct,
d01roK
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